I think in our culture today there is so much confusion when it comes to what “success” is.
Similarly to many others, I used to associate success with climbing the corporate ladder, gaining prestige and respect, a fat pay-check at the end of the month.
But I tried all of that. I did all of that. And instead of feeling successful, I felt stressed, anxious and very unhappy.
And I can’t help but wonder, how did we end up so confused and misaligned with ourselves? We sell our souls and dreams for money and false reputation. Because does it really matter if those around us respect us, if we don’t respect ourselves enough to pursue what truly matters us?
I just did a quick search online, and I found the following definition for “success”:
“Success is the state of living in alignment with what matters most to you—whether that’s personal growth, meaningful relationships, purposeful work, inner peace, or contributing to the world in a way that feels authentic.
It’s less about external validation (titles, money, prestige) and more about the quiet knowing that you are living your life with intention and integrity.”
Why don’t they teach us this definition at school? Why are we given the wrong idea instead? – The idea that external validation and material possessions are what matters most in this life.
I remember sitting in one of my very first lectures at university, when the professor explained the financial perks we could expect after graduation if we pursued a career as Software Engineers. He spoke of salaries, bonuses, and job security — but not once did he mention passion, purpose, or whether we might actually enjoy the work.
And so I listened, and I dreamed — dreamed of prestige and money. At the time, it seemed enough. I thought that with a respected title and a good pay-check, everything else would fall into place. What I didn’t realise was that chasing someone else’s version of success would eventually leave me feeling empty and lost.
But thankfully eventually, I reached the realisation of this false ideal of living., And after 12 years of chasing after the wrong dream, I finally gathered the courage to quit my ”well respected” job as a Software Engineer and start living with purpose.
Earl Nightingale defined success as the progressive realisation of a worthy ideal.
And Tony Robbins said:
“Success without fulfilment is the ultimate failure.”
To me, success today is waking up every morning eager to start my day and do what I love most — to write, to read, to teach, and to truly live. It’s no longer about titles or pay-checks; it’s about living in alignment with who I am and what brings me joy.
How about you?
What does success mean to you? What truly brings you joy? And do these two align in your life?
Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.
Maya Angelou